Arizona Ranch Owner Wants Out: Too Many Alien Attacks

Too Many Alien Attacks For Him

An Arizona ranch owner wants out due to alien attacks on his property. John Edmonds has owned the nine-acre Starlight Ranch in Rainbow Valley, Arizona since 1995. He claims that he is constantly being attacked by grey aliens. One flaw (amongst many) that the grey aliens have is that they don’t respect peoples’ personal space. Not only that, but they are prone to violence to further their cause.

Mr. Edmonds claims that he has had to use his swords to slay 19 grey aliens since living at the ranch. “Unless you cut the head off and disconnect the antennae, so to speak, they instantly ‘phone home.’ Even with a razor-sharp sword, it is nearly impossible to decapitate them with one swing.”

His wife, Joyce, narrowly escaped being abducted by aliens. They idled their UFO above his property and used their beam to lift her out of her bed and managed to get her out of the house. Luckily, Joyce is still with us in the Milky Way. Edmonds shared a picture of an alleged alien-caused boo-boo on his Facebook page.

arizona ranch owner sick of alien attacks

Edmonds Offers Word Of Caution For Potential Buyers

The ranch, which is on the market for $5 million, has five bedrooms, a nice swimming pool, a guest house, a hay barn, and can house 20 horses. I commend Edmonds for being upfront about the property. I’m a huge fan of truth in advertising. It must be stated that his word of caution doubles as a selling point for people who may be into the whole “being-attacked-by-aliens” thing. Different strokes for different folks.

The ranch owner says of the property: “It’s not something for a traditional family, but it holds a lot of secrets and what I believe are future opportunities to understand forces that are in the universe. Please be very well grounded because the energy here has the tendency to manifest with whatever is going on with you.”

Well, I guess the property wouldn’t be a good fit for me, then. I’ve got some terrible things going on in my noggin.

via: Global News

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