Pamela Anderson Tried To Flirt Past Secret Service

Anderson Tried To Flirt Past Secret Service, Wants Assange Pardoned

You can’t spell “Assange” without “A.S.S.” Sorry, it was just begging to be written. Please accept my apology. I have no opinion on the guy one way or the other. [Non Sequitur]. Pamela Anderson tried to flirt past Secret Service agents to gain access to Vice President Mike Pence’s New York hotel room. Obviously, it didn’t work. Maybe if it was the Pamela Anderson from 25 years ago. Even then, it’s still a big maybe. Now, if it was Bill Clinton in that hotel room, he would’ve said, “Hillary, go for a walk. I want to have sexual relations with that woman.”

Ms. Anderson had designs on getting into Mike Pence’s room so she could talk to him about her buddy, Julian Assange. She wants the vice president to talk to Trump about granting him a pardon. It’s not going to happen. He leaked sensitive information about the United States and really ruffled some feathers. He rubbed them the wrong way, big time.

She thought she had enough sex appeal and skills to pull off the caper, but, she didn’t and never will. For one thing, Pence is no Matt Lauer. He never meets with any females without his wife present.

Pamela Anderson tries to flirt past secret service

Julian Assange has been living for three years in the Ecuadorian embassy in London, England. He is shacked up there in order to avoid extradition. It’s a beautiful building. Anderson said that her buddy is living in a “cramped” room and says that he isn’t looking too well. She isn’t lying about the latter; I’ve seen better heads on cabbage. As far as him living in a “cramped” room, I’ve had apartments that were smaller than his “room.” It’s a nice cozy space with all the amenities one could ask for. We’re talking fancy computer equipment, a hi-fi stereo, a color television, the works. Not too shabby, and he’s living there for free. He also gets visits from all his hipster celebrity friends. So, he really has no reason to complain about his situation. He could be in prison with no computer in his cell. That would drive him nuts. The guy would rather be dead than to be without a computer and the Interwebz. He even has a cat that has its own Twitter page! I don’t have a cat with a Twitter page and I’m not even a lawbreaker. Talk about unfair! Some guys have it all.

A witness to Pamela Anderson’s shenanigans told the NY Post: “The Secret Service agent practically swooned and fainted when she walked up to him and started pressing her finger on his badge. Pam said, ‘I’d like to meet the vice president.’ The agent did get it together enough to politely refuse, saying the vice president was busy.”